ROUND TWENTY

[Tricia]

Thanks so much to Chaos for her wonderful help with the forum.
I will talk to Collin and see if we can't get her mod status set up so she can boss us all around.

I myself love love love it when she bosses me around.
Tricia do this!
Tricia do that!
Tricia stop using your flogger on Wench's cat


Okay I have the words from the Queen of the Cloakroom... I mean Diva.

Here we go... into Round 20.





[glow=green,2,300]~WORDS FROM THE CLOAKROOM~[/glow]
Moratorium
Plethora
Bunch
Pickle
Demise
Discipline



With a word list like this I think it only fair to lock Diva in the cloakroom until she begs for mercy... like I am begging for mercy.

Plethora? PLEASE!
Pickle? Well... I can write pickle stories.
But moratorium?

*rolls eyes*
sheesh!

[Chaos]

Tricia, how many times have I told you to leave the Wench's kitty alone?!?

Dammit...soon, with Collin's Super Mod Power bestowed upon me, everyone shall have to do as I say! Mwahahahaha...

Ahem...excuse me...I'm OK now. Reallly.

Anyway...OK, thanks, Tricia for posting the words and everything, but do you think you will *ever* remember again that we need a deadline, here? Or are you just mentally blocking the whole deadline concept? Huh...that's probably it...

So, my lovelies, the deadline for Round Twenty is Friday, March 18th...one week from today...at midnight, I think...yeah, midnight, next Friday night.

If you want an extension at that time, you better have a *really* good reason for needing it...and keep in mind, I used to work in the Collections department at the phone company, so I've heard some really fantastic excuses!

Good luck and happy writing, everyone!

[ThatWickedWench]

HAPPY writing you say? HAPPY FREAKING WRITING?!?

With THOSE words?

Happy?

What are you smoking Chaos?

(And why wasn't i invited?)

[Chaos]

Heheh...Wench, you know what I'm smoking, and I thought you knew that you're always, permanently invited!

(If not, consider yourself hereby "permanently" invited...)

Look at this way, guys...Diva's words present a unique opportunity to challenge ourselves to write fantastic stories, with some pretty outrageous words. I like 'em, even while I'm hating them, if that makes any sense!

[sidra]

i like the world "pickle". just say it. heh. pickle.

all right. we'll see if i can't get my shiney little hiney in gear and actually write a freakin' story this week.

[Tricia]

Right now I have a PLETHORA of PICKLE stories rolling around in my head. A whole BUNCH of pickle stories... but which to choose?

Hmmmmmmmmmm

Must retire to the cloakroom to ponder this weighty pickle dilemma.


Oh yeah and the deadline is March 18th... so there Chaos... Miss I just got to pick on the poor Dark Queen of the Underworld!

Like I don't have my hands full trying to find that stupid cat.

Will somebody please remind Wench's cat that my flogger is NOT a cat toy!

Sheesh... and that was my new one too!

[ThatWickedWench]

This is just sad. I mean, where the hell are all the stories? I, have mine, here.

Well, it's in my head I just haven't put it into .doc form yet.

Somehow, I have this feeling that I'm still way ahead of most of you.

Keep in mind, the Chaos Person has stipulated that there will be no extending of anything time related in this matter.

If I am the only one to post, do I automatically win by default? Cause that would be pathetic.

[Chaos]

Oh, ye of little faith, my Wenchie-poo! First of all, that "Chaos Person," as you so callously referred to me, was not quite as strict as you seem to recall.

If you want an extension at that time, you better have a *really* good reason for needing it...and keep in mind, I used to work in the Collections department at the phone company, so I've heard some really fantastic excuses!

Those were my actual words, so you see what this presents all of you lovely budding writers, right? This is just another opportunity for creativity! The best excuse wins the extension of their choosing. How's that?

Not that I'm not ready....please don't think that for even a moment...my story's done, oh, yes, it is...really...but if you guys need more time, well....give me a good reason why, and hell...maybe we'll vote on "best excuse," who knows?

And, no, Wizzay...being the only poster doesn't earn a win by default. If you're the only poster, we all get to flog your kitty! ;D

[sidra]

um... so... like... i've been sick, and then my dog got sick... and... yeah. so... is tomorrow okay? or sunday? all i need is like one more day. i swear. i totally swear it's ready to do, i just need to write it all.

pleeeeese?

evil don't beg much you know...

[Chaos]

Sidra, Sidra, Sidra. I am so disappointed in you, girl! I just knew that of any excuses I might receive tonight, yours would be the most creative and compelling. Damn. I hate to be wrong.

So, no...no extension.

Unless you can come up with a better excuse than that.

I once had a woman call me up at work (in Collections, at the phone company) to tell me that the reason she hadn't paid her phone bill was because the squirrels had eaten all the wires in her car. Seriously, that is a true story. I laughed until I cried, and then I told her I'd give her seven more days to get the bill paid before we cut her service, just because her excuse was the best I'd ever heard.

[Chaos]

AD1

"What a bunch of bullshit," Kyla muttered angrily as she stalked her way across the parking lot. "Who the fuck are these idiots, sitting around making up rules that only make our lives more miserable? Since when do they have to work under these rules and regulations, I want to know? Since fucking never, that's when," Kyla continued her diatribe as she scanned the lot for her rust-brown Accord. "Goddammit, why can't I ever find that piece of shit car of mine?" she wondered, peering around the parking lot full of cars.

She'd just come from a Friday afternoon mandatory employee meeting during which the company had informed them of the many changes (none of them good) taking place since the buy-out by some huge, nameless conglomerate. Longer hours, shorter lunch breaks, fewer holidays, and if not less pay, at least no raises for 48 months, "to give the financials time to settle," whatever the fuck that meant. And on top of all that, as if it weren't enough, for God's sake, a moratorium on vacation time for the next six months! "I don't know why they don't just fit us with fucking bridles and lasso us to our desks," Kyla grumbled, finally finding her car and climbing behind the wheel.

She knew she probably looked like an insane person, walking around talking to herself angrily, but she didn't much care at this moment in time. She'd been with this company her entire adult life, ever since they'd hired her straight out of college. She'd planned to retire from this company; now, for all intents and purposes, it seemed that the Powers-That-Be within the company were attempting to piss off and/or get rid of all their long-time, faithful employees!

Kyla drove on autopilot toward her apartment in the city, her mind occupied by the pickle she'd found herself in today. Right at this moment she didn't exactly have many choices, really. It was either put up with the bullshit in her current position, or look for another job, and unfortunately, Kyla knew she didn't possess the self-discipline that getting a resume together and going job-hunting required.

So, Kyla thought grimly, the only alternative is to just put up with the bullshit. She could damn well make it as difficult on them as humanly possible, though. And she knew exactly how she was going to do it.

All the way home Kyla fine-tuned her half-formed plan. She knew it would involve some risk, as well as the cooperation of her co-workers. Gaining that cooperation, in light of the potential risk, would probably be the toughest part of the whole thing, but Kyla knew that if she could pull this off, it would result in either better conditions at work, or she would be terminated altogether. Either way, Kyla concluded, her situation would be much improved. It's worth a shot, she decided.

Arriving home, Kyla made a beeline for her bedroom filing cabinet, where she was sure she had a copy of the company's Policies Manual. She ripped through folder after folder of paperwork, receipts, forms, and product manuals for devices and appliances she no longer owned before she finally found what she was looking for. Holding the loosely bound pages as if they were made of gold, Kyla grabbed several different colored highlighters and went to work.

Four hours later Kyla rubbed her blurry eyes and sat back to admire her work. She'd highlighted every single procedure and policy in the manual that wasn't followed strictly by the letter on a daily basis. As she'd known it would, that covered about 2/3 of the book. Smiling to herself, she wondered how the bigwigs would react to total and complete conformity to the "law of the land." Should be interesting, anyway, Kyla thought sleepily. She glanced at her watch and saw that it was nearly one o'clock in the morning. She left everything just as it was, deciding that the next phase of her plan would have to wait until morning. She drifted off to sleep with happy images of a plethora of outraged management-types in her head, a small smile on her lips.

********************

Saturday morning, Kyla woke refreshed and excited about executing the rest of her plan. She hoped to take care of notifying everyone of her intentions and getting everyone on the same page, so to speak, before the weekend was out, so that the plan could be implemented first thing Monday morning.

She pulled out the latest issue of the company's employee directory, in which she'd already highlighted all of the people in her department. Checking the clock on the microwave she saw that it was nearly 9:00 am, and she decided that it was late enough to start calling. Hopefully she would catch most of them still at home before they ventured out for whatever their weekend plans happened to be.

She picked up the phone and dialed the first name on her alphabetical list, Corrine Amos. When Corrine, who also happened to be a smoking-buddy of Kyla's, answered the phone, Kyla apologized for bothering her on a Saturday morning, and then quickly explained her plan. Corrine enthusiastically endorsed Kyla's ideas and promised to begin making phone calls to people that she knew in other departments. They exchanged goodbyes, agreeing to get in touch again on Sunday evening around 8:00 pm for a progress report.

Encouraged by Corrine's response, Kyla zipped through the remaining 31 names on her list. Only two of the employees she attempted to contact were not at home and the other 29 were as excited about Kyla's plan as Corrine had been. All of them were right now highlighting their own copies of the Manual, preparing for Operation: Demise of the Despots, as the plan had somehow been dubbed along the way. They all recognized the need for action, and since they weren't unionized (thereby making a strike logistically impossible), this was the best possible plan.

Kyla dedicated all of her considerable energy and focus on the project all weekend and by Sunday night she felt confident that everyone was ready for the coming week. She had intended to just start with the employees and policies of her own department, but as the word spread people started calling their friends, family members, and significant others in various other departments to fill them in. Kyla's phone didn't stop ringing from about noon on Saturday until five o'clock Sunday afternoon; she spoke to complete strangers who'd invariably been given her number by someone in her own department, instructing them on the details of the plan and urging them to call everyone at the company that they knew, to get the word out.

By the time Kyla fell, exhausted, into her bed late Sunday night, she felt fairly confident that the majority of the workforce knew of the plan and intended to participate in its implementation. The few people still "out of the loop" could be brought up to date quickly Monday morning by their co-workers. Everything was in place.

********************

Monday morning, Kyla met her co-worker's covert glances with a smile. Everyone was waiting anxiously for the official start of the day, at 8:30 am, when the plan would be put into motion…slow motion, that is.

Finally, 8:30 came, and everyone went to work. Each and every single thing that each and every single employee did was completely "by the book." Nearly without exception, this extended the time needed for these various procedures by at least 50%, and sometimes as much as 90%. By 11:00 am, the production numbers had almost stagnated. The number crunchers on the top floor were in a blind panic, making phone calls to their underlings with demands to find out what the hell was going on.

By 1:00 pm, the entire company was painfully aware of Operation: DotD, if not in actual name, then at least in the spirit of it. No manager or supervisor in the building could claim that his or her employees were slacking off or not doing their jobs, because everyone was very much hard at work. Nor could management say that any procedural rules were being broken; in fact, they all remarked at some point or other in the day that they had never seen the rules followed quite so carefully in their entire careers with the company.

Unfortunately for the bigwigs, but very fortunately for Kyla and her peers, there didn't seem to be a thing they could do about the abrupt slow-down of production within all departments of the company. Obviously, at this point, the upper echelon had figured out what the peons were about, but they were certainly in no position to fire every employee in the building, and so far they had been unable to locate even one employee who was not participating in this outrage.

By the close of business on that Monday an executive decision was finally reached and word was passed down through the ranks that management would just ride this "phase" out. They didn't believe that the employees would be able to remain cohesive enough as a group to continue their ridiculous slow-down for more than a day or two, at most. That is where they were wrong.

Kyla and her peers proved themselves fully capable of holding out just as long as the management team. They were in "flight-or-fight" mode, anyway, with everything they'd been used to for so many years in jeopardy they felt they didn't have much to lose. The management folks, on the other hand, were just too damn stubborn to admit that they just might have been wrong in effecting so much negative change all at once.

[Chaos]

(AD1 cont'd)

As a direct result, Operation DotD lasted for more than three and a half months; longer than anyone, Kyla herself included, had ever expected. By the eventual end, the company's financials were exactly the opposite of "settled," as the slow-down had drained the company's resources, which then caused the stock to drop like a stone to less than fifty cents per share. The head executives knew that they could not continue like this for another two weeks, even, without having to declare themselves bankrupt, so, fifteen weeks too late, they posted a notice of a mandatory all-employee meeting to be held the following day at 4:00 pm.

The next day, at four o'clock on the dot, Kyla and her friends crowded with the rest of the employee population into the auditorium that they used for major conferences and presentations. The CEO of the company stood on the stage before them, obviously uncomfortable and even a bit angry that he had to be where he was, doing what he knew must be done.

For the next hour, the increasingly agitated CEO talked to the employees about the situation they'd all found themselves in. He played on their loyalty to the company, their need for their jobs, and the fear of the company's incipient bankruptcy to convince them that the slow-down had to stop immediately or they would all, himself included, be out of a job. He read slowly down the list he had compiled of what management perceived as being the worst of the wrongs done to the hourly, frontline employees. After each item, he informed the crowd of the revision being made, if any, to the policy.

In the end, Kyla and her peers were granted almost everything that they wanted, collectively, with only two or three very minor exceptions and they vowed as one to resume full production rates beginning the following Monday to try to save the company that they all loved, whether they cared to admit it or not.

********************

As Kyla drove home that evening, she felt extremely empowered and self-confident, knowing it was she who had effected this change for the better for herself and all of her peers. The last thing she thought before the overloaded semi nudged her off the road and into the deep ravine, her car flipping and bouncing from ridge to ridge, was that she felt just like Norma Rae, from that old union movie. When her car hit the bottom of the ravine, upside-down, it burst into flame, leaving no doubt that Kyla was dead.

********************

The driver of the semi removed the ski mask covering his face, revealing the smooth, even features of the company's CEO. "You made your point…and now I'm quite sure that I've made mine." He chuckled softly to himself as he imagined the water-cooler conversation on Monday morning, as he mentally drafted the revised revision to company policy, which would include swift and immediate retribution for any employee who deliberately participated in any sort of slow-down of production in the future. Time to let 'em know who's really the boss, he thought as he calmly drove away.

[ThatWickedWench]

I was attempting to get my story all written and out of my head when out of the dark loomed a massive dark figure. It overwhelmed me. I was speechless, I didn't even have time to scream before I was being struck about the shoulders left and right... with.. with a.. with a....
PeNIs!!

I was mortifi... okay I kinda liked it, who am I trying to kid? And, in a slobbering, horny kinda confusion, my train of thought was temporarily derailed! I mean, there was a PENIS and I was being BEATEN with it... wouldn't you have been a little disconcerted?

Anyhow, what say we make the penis extension til Sunday? I mean story extension, yea, that's what I meant.

[Chaos]

OK, OK...we'll do a damn extension. But I don't think Sunday is our solution. What'll happen Sunday is that everyone will say they were too busy enjoying their weekend to work on a story...it's a vicious cycle, I know.

So...I suppose we'll have an extension until Tuesday (the 22nd), at 9:00 pm ET. Does that suit everyone?

[ThatWickedWench]

Technically I would agree that Tuesday is an excellent time to close the extension. BUT, what happens if I can't post my story until Tuesday night when I get home from work? And I don't get OFF til 10:15 or HOME until 11 for that matter? *sigh* okay I guess I will just succumb to the inevitable. Tues@9pm it is. Is that ET by the way? Cause 9pm Pacific time would be midnight ET and then that would be awesome... lmfao