Post by sidra on Jan 7, 2005 20:47:53 GMT -5
SG1
“Hey. Wake up.”<br>
James Galden, MD, jerked in the chair that he had been sleeping in. He had been up reviewing the Bicket girl’s case, going over the minutiae of it again and again, hoping that he would find something to help him save her. She was only a fourteen-year-old girl; she had an entire life ahead of her… it wasn’t fair that God would try and SWINDLE her out of living a full life. James knew that life wasn’t fair. He knew that despite his best efforts, people still died every day. But he would damn well even the odds. He had kept Valerie alive this long; he would restore her to her full life if it was the last thing he did. It was the least he could do, especially for the girl’s mother.
It was amazing to him that he had fallen asleep at all. He had been tossing and turning for weeks over this case, wondering what in the world caused this wasting sickness that, try as he might, he could not cure. It was as if Valerie had lost all will to live. Trying to save her was like keeping hold of someone dangling over the edge of a precipice and not being able to pull them up. His friends and colleagues had all remarked on his ABERRANT behavior, but he couldn’t help but obsess over the girl. He had never lost a patient, ever, not in ten years of practicing medicine, and he was loosing one now. Now it seemed like he could do nothing but pray as hard as he could that his healing powers would not fail him. God had given him this gift; He surely wouldn’t let Valerie slip away before him.
“James.” The voice that said his name was oddly familiar. James rubbed at his eyes and looked around the room. He lived alone in a small house; though he made a good deal of money in his profession he didn’t spend much of it on himself. He was a bachelor, and rather given to slovenliness as he was married to his job and thought of little else. He had, under pressure from family and friends, finally hired a maid to keep his house clean for him; a middle-aged woman who reminded him of his mother. It was the reason he had hired her, really; she didn’t do a perfect job but she had ended up being quite reliable and honest. She had a key to the house, as he kept strange hours at the hospital and wasn’t always there to let her in. James felt more than actually saw the woman standing in the doorway of his study, and remember
ed that he hadn’t paid the housekeeper yet this week. This was the second time this month that he had been late in paying her; he should really give her a little extra in apology. It was a lucky thing he was home to pay her, but since Valerie was stable for the moment, the hospital had forced him to go home and rest.
“Sorry, Lacey,” he said absently, reaching for his checkbook. “Let me write you a check…”
“A good deal of people have tried to bribe me over the years.” The woman, who was certainly not Lacey, stepped forward so that the light from his desk lamp shone more fully on her pale features. “But not many have mistaken me for the help.”<br>
James whirled around in his chair, his checkbook forgotten. A tall, thin young woman with dark hair stood there with her arms crossed, a small smile curling her lips upward. James’ surprise instantly faded. There was something comforting about the woman’s presence. He felt as if an old friend had stopped by for a visit.
“Um… hello,” James said, blinking at her. She was beautiful. She reminded him of Helena, though they looked nothing alike. Helena had been blonde and curvy where this woman had a shock of midnight-black hair and was thin as a rail. Helena would never have been caught dead in something so common as a pair of holey jeans and a black tank-top, and she certainly wouldn’t have worn as much silver jewelry. But the part of him that was still in love with Helena, and it was a large part, was reminded of her when he looked into this woman’s eyes. He blushed and turned away from her gaze, almost ashamed of the LASCIVIOUS thoughts that always crept into his head when he thought of Helena. For whatever reason, whenever he relived his times with Helena, he saw her face, flushed red and glowing with the heat of ORGASM. He knew it was odd, but that was how he remembered her best. So few women reminded him of her anymore. He had hoped that no one would, ever again. Her absence from his life always opened a black wound in his heart that he wished he could heal as well as he did those of his patients. The pale woman’s voice startled him out of his REVERIE.
“Hello, James,” she said. “Do you mind if I sit?”<br>
“No, not at all,” he answered, standing and offering her his chair, as it was the only one in the room. She laughed and gestured for him to sit back down, then pulled another chair up beside his. James blinked again. He was sure that he had no other chairs in the room, but she had just seated herself in what was unmistakably one of the chairs from his dining room table. Lacey must have brought it in his study for some reason and forgot to put it back.
“Thank you,” she said gravely, folding her hands in her lap. “So.”<br>
“Um… do I know you from somewhere?” James didn’t even wonder to himself who this woman was or how she had gotten into his house. He only felt very strongly that he knew her, but he couldn’t for the life of him remember her name.
She smiled again. “Everyone knows me, James.”<br>
“Then we have met? I’m sorry, but I just can’t seem to recall your name.”<br>
“We’ve met once.” The woman leaned back and casually crossed her arms. “You’re lucky, you know. Generally I don’t meet people more than twice. But I felt that I had to come by and talk to you before this gets out of hand.”<br>
“Before what gets out of hand?”<br>
“The situation with Valerie Bicket, of course,” the woman said calmly. “You can’t save her. She’s meant to go. And if you don’t stop wasting your powers trying to save her, you’ll die yourself.”<br>
James immediately got defensive, as he did whenever anyone tried to convince him he was fighting a loosing battle with Valerie. “She’s only fourteen years old, she’s got her whole life ahead of her! How can I stand by and let her life just slip away? How can I look into her mother’s eyes and tell her that there is nothing I can do? Damn it, I can’t accept that! I can’t!”<br>
“I know. It’s not easy,” the pale woman said, and in her voice was such empathy and sorrow that James was rendered momentarily speechless. “But you have been given a gift, and you can’t waste it on someone who’s already doomed. Life isn’t fair. Things aren’t always perfect. And there’s your own life to consider.”<br>
“I…” James buried his head in his hands in frustration. “I have to try,” he whispered. “I have to. How can my life be more important than the life of Helena’s daughter?”<br>
The pale woman reached out and sympathetically patted his arm. James suddenly burst into tears at her touch. “A true healer is rare,” she said softly, so that he could barely hear her above his sobbing. “You’ve done the right thing with your power. Ever since you healed that little boy just by touching him, you’ve done nothing but the right thing.”<br>
“H-how did you know about that?” he whispered, looking at her through tear-heavy eyes. “I never… I’ve never told anyone, not even Helena…”
“James,” the woman said, “surely you know who I am by now.”<br>
James blinked his tears away. He looked more closely at the woman. Her skin was pale, nearly white, and she was wearing an anhk pendant that gleamed silver against her black shirt. She wouldn’t look directly into his eyes, but somehow he didn’t want her to. “I think… I…” Understanding suddenly dawned on him, and he jumped out of his chair and got down on his knees in front of her. “Please, I’m begging you, don’t take her! Take me instead! Her life is worth ten of mine…”
“No, it’s not,” Death answered levelly. “She’s had her time. You haven’t. And I’m here to tell you that you’re going to kill yourself trying to save her if you don’t give up and let her go. Either I take her, or I take both of you.”<br>
James started sobbing into his hands again. “It’s punishment, isn’t it? Because of my affair with Helena? God sent you to punish us…”
Death started laughing. “Oh, please,” she snorted. “Don’t be INANE. I’ve got nothing to do with any of that. There are other rules I have to follow. It’s not a punishment, James, it’s just life. Please, get up off the floor.” James looked up to see that Death had stood. She did not offer a hand to lift him up. He supposed that perhaps she wanted to, but couldn’t. He pulled himself to his feet, still not meeting her eyes, but looking pleadingly at her all the same.
“There has to be a way,” he said. “There has to.”<br>
“There isn’t.” She shook her dark head. “I’m sorry, James, but those are the rules.”<br>
“But…” James began again, “she’s just a girl…”
“And?”<br>
“And… well… she’s got her whole life, and I’ve already lived forty years…”
“Sure,” Death said. “Some of us get more time that others, but we still only get a lifetime. Valerie’s lifetime is up. Yours isn’t. Look, I shouldn’t even be involving myself in this, but I am really not in the mood to take a Healer today, all right? It’s a huge pain in the butt, trust me. Let her go.”<br>
“I can’t…” he began, but she interrupted him.
“Hey. Wake up.”<br>
James Galden, MD, jerked in the chair that he had been sleeping in. He had been up reviewing the Bicket girl’s case, going over the minutiae of it again and again, hoping that he would find something to help him save her. She was only a fourteen-year-old girl; she had an entire life ahead of her… it wasn’t fair that God would try and SWINDLE her out of living a full life. James knew that life wasn’t fair. He knew that despite his best efforts, people still died every day. But he would damn well even the odds. He had kept Valerie alive this long; he would restore her to her full life if it was the last thing he did. It was the least he could do, especially for the girl’s mother.
It was amazing to him that he had fallen asleep at all. He had been tossing and turning for weeks over this case, wondering what in the world caused this wasting sickness that, try as he might, he could not cure. It was as if Valerie had lost all will to live. Trying to save her was like keeping hold of someone dangling over the edge of a precipice and not being able to pull them up. His friends and colleagues had all remarked on his ABERRANT behavior, but he couldn’t help but obsess over the girl. He had never lost a patient, ever, not in ten years of practicing medicine, and he was loosing one now. Now it seemed like he could do nothing but pray as hard as he could that his healing powers would not fail him. God had given him this gift; He surely wouldn’t let Valerie slip away before him.
“James.” The voice that said his name was oddly familiar. James rubbed at his eyes and looked around the room. He lived alone in a small house; though he made a good deal of money in his profession he didn’t spend much of it on himself. He was a bachelor, and rather given to slovenliness as he was married to his job and thought of little else. He had, under pressure from family and friends, finally hired a maid to keep his house clean for him; a middle-aged woman who reminded him of his mother. It was the reason he had hired her, really; she didn’t do a perfect job but she had ended up being quite reliable and honest. She had a key to the house, as he kept strange hours at the hospital and wasn’t always there to let her in. James felt more than actually saw the woman standing in the doorway of his study, and remember
ed that he hadn’t paid the housekeeper yet this week. This was the second time this month that he had been late in paying her; he should really give her a little extra in apology. It was a lucky thing he was home to pay her, but since Valerie was stable for the moment, the hospital had forced him to go home and rest.
“Sorry, Lacey,” he said absently, reaching for his checkbook. “Let me write you a check…”
“A good deal of people have tried to bribe me over the years.” The woman, who was certainly not Lacey, stepped forward so that the light from his desk lamp shone more fully on her pale features. “But not many have mistaken me for the help.”<br>
James whirled around in his chair, his checkbook forgotten. A tall, thin young woman with dark hair stood there with her arms crossed, a small smile curling her lips upward. James’ surprise instantly faded. There was something comforting about the woman’s presence. He felt as if an old friend had stopped by for a visit.
“Um… hello,” James said, blinking at her. She was beautiful. She reminded him of Helena, though they looked nothing alike. Helena had been blonde and curvy where this woman had a shock of midnight-black hair and was thin as a rail. Helena would never have been caught dead in something so common as a pair of holey jeans and a black tank-top, and she certainly wouldn’t have worn as much silver jewelry. But the part of him that was still in love with Helena, and it was a large part, was reminded of her when he looked into this woman’s eyes. He blushed and turned away from her gaze, almost ashamed of the LASCIVIOUS thoughts that always crept into his head when he thought of Helena. For whatever reason, whenever he relived his times with Helena, he saw her face, flushed red and glowing with the heat of ORGASM. He knew it was odd, but that was how he remembered her best. So few women reminded him of her anymore. He had hoped that no one would, ever again. Her absence from his life always opened a black wound in his heart that he wished he could heal as well as he did those of his patients. The pale woman’s voice startled him out of his REVERIE.
“Hello, James,” she said. “Do you mind if I sit?”<br>
“No, not at all,” he answered, standing and offering her his chair, as it was the only one in the room. She laughed and gestured for him to sit back down, then pulled another chair up beside his. James blinked again. He was sure that he had no other chairs in the room, but she had just seated herself in what was unmistakably one of the chairs from his dining room table. Lacey must have brought it in his study for some reason and forgot to put it back.
“Thank you,” she said gravely, folding her hands in her lap. “So.”<br>
“Um… do I know you from somewhere?” James didn’t even wonder to himself who this woman was or how she had gotten into his house. He only felt very strongly that he knew her, but he couldn’t for the life of him remember her name.
She smiled again. “Everyone knows me, James.”<br>
“Then we have met? I’m sorry, but I just can’t seem to recall your name.”<br>
“We’ve met once.” The woman leaned back and casually crossed her arms. “You’re lucky, you know. Generally I don’t meet people more than twice. But I felt that I had to come by and talk to you before this gets out of hand.”<br>
“Before what gets out of hand?”<br>
“The situation with Valerie Bicket, of course,” the woman said calmly. “You can’t save her. She’s meant to go. And if you don’t stop wasting your powers trying to save her, you’ll die yourself.”<br>
James immediately got defensive, as he did whenever anyone tried to convince him he was fighting a loosing battle with Valerie. “She’s only fourteen years old, she’s got her whole life ahead of her! How can I stand by and let her life just slip away? How can I look into her mother’s eyes and tell her that there is nothing I can do? Damn it, I can’t accept that! I can’t!”<br>
“I know. It’s not easy,” the pale woman said, and in her voice was such empathy and sorrow that James was rendered momentarily speechless. “But you have been given a gift, and you can’t waste it on someone who’s already doomed. Life isn’t fair. Things aren’t always perfect. And there’s your own life to consider.”<br>
“I…” James buried his head in his hands in frustration. “I have to try,” he whispered. “I have to. How can my life be more important than the life of Helena’s daughter?”<br>
The pale woman reached out and sympathetically patted his arm. James suddenly burst into tears at her touch. “A true healer is rare,” she said softly, so that he could barely hear her above his sobbing. “You’ve done the right thing with your power. Ever since you healed that little boy just by touching him, you’ve done nothing but the right thing.”<br>
“H-how did you know about that?” he whispered, looking at her through tear-heavy eyes. “I never… I’ve never told anyone, not even Helena…”
“James,” the woman said, “surely you know who I am by now.”<br>
James blinked his tears away. He looked more closely at the woman. Her skin was pale, nearly white, and she was wearing an anhk pendant that gleamed silver against her black shirt. She wouldn’t look directly into his eyes, but somehow he didn’t want her to. “I think… I…” Understanding suddenly dawned on him, and he jumped out of his chair and got down on his knees in front of her. “Please, I’m begging you, don’t take her! Take me instead! Her life is worth ten of mine…”
“No, it’s not,” Death answered levelly. “She’s had her time. You haven’t. And I’m here to tell you that you’re going to kill yourself trying to save her if you don’t give up and let her go. Either I take her, or I take both of you.”<br>
James started sobbing into his hands again. “It’s punishment, isn’t it? Because of my affair with Helena? God sent you to punish us…”
Death started laughing. “Oh, please,” she snorted. “Don’t be INANE. I’ve got nothing to do with any of that. There are other rules I have to follow. It’s not a punishment, James, it’s just life. Please, get up off the floor.” James looked up to see that Death had stood. She did not offer a hand to lift him up. He supposed that perhaps she wanted to, but couldn’t. He pulled himself to his feet, still not meeting her eyes, but looking pleadingly at her all the same.
“There has to be a way,” he said. “There has to.”<br>
“There isn’t.” She shook her dark head. “I’m sorry, James, but those are the rules.”<br>
“But…” James began again, “she’s just a girl…”
“And?”<br>
“And… well… she’s got her whole life, and I’ve already lived forty years…”
“Sure,” Death said. “Some of us get more time that others, but we still only get a lifetime. Valerie’s lifetime is up. Yours isn’t. Look, I shouldn’t even be involving myself in this, but I am really not in the mood to take a Healer today, all right? It’s a huge pain in the butt, trust me. Let her go.”<br>
“I can’t…” he began, but she interrupted him.
